How To Attract, Seduce, Meet and ‘Pick-Up’ Women

All right, the final piece of this puzzle, and another important thing to consider.  It doesn’t matter how comfortable you are with yourself and the girl if you’re in a place or situation that makes you uncomfortable.  If you can at all, get you and the girl into a place or situation that is comfortable to you both, or at least isn’t directly UNcomfortable.  If you’re a sort of person who’s more relaxed in a quiet atmosphere, you probably wouldn’t want to do most of your meeting people in a loud, chaotic club.  If there’s a slightly quieter place in the very near vicinity (the same building, perhaps by the door or bar), you may want to suggest moving over there so that you can actually hear each other talk.  If, on the other hand, you do well in such an atmosphere, you could stay right there and feel right at home.

It’s also generally more comfortable to be talking to someone one-on-one, rather than trying to single her out of a group of friends…however, it can prove difficult to pull her away from the friends, as the “safety in numbers” attitude tends to keep them stuck pretty close together.  You won’t always be able to get into a perfectly comfortable situation, but sometimes you need to bite the bullet and do whatever you can to be at ease in the situation you’re in.

That’s the key: be at ease.  It’s the whole reason I’m trying to teach you to be comfortable.  Comfort = more at ease.  More at ease = smoother, less uptight, more likely to be at your best.  When you’re relaxed and not all wired up about things, a bit of confidence shows out and you become significantly more appealing.  Just think about it…if you were a badass guitar player, would you be more comfortable, relaxed, and confident if you were holding a guitar or if you were holding a trombone?  Being in a familiar or comfortable situation gives you a higher chance of success in whatever you do.

So until next time, keep checking back in for updates, and I hope these tips work for you.

Once you’ve become comfortable with yourself, the next step is to become comfortable with the girl you’re after.  You can be as confident as you want with yourself, but if you’re not comfortable with HER, you’ll still crash.  Being unsure of how to approach a particular girl can cause fatal stumbling and mess you up big time…

So how to avoid?  Become as comfortable with her as you are with yourself!  Pretty much what you do is about the same as the first part of becoming comfortable with yourself.  Look at her, assess her, and come up with a few things that you like about her.  Obviously stay away from the “shallow” intrigues, such as how big her rack is or how killer her ass is. 

These positive traits you’re noticing here are good conversation topics.  By taking the time to really look, and get the “whole picture” rather than just staring at her chest or rear, you already get a point or two.  By taking real note and noticing things that she’s likely done some work on to get them to that point, you’re accomplishing even more.  I’m a family guy, so I’ve spent enough time with my mother that I know how much work it takes for a woman to do her hair…and it’s not just wasted time.  It actually takes that long.  With all that’s involved in getting it to “look good,” a little appreciation goes a long way.

So yes, find a few things to appreciate about her, before you ever approach her.  It shouldn’t be that hard…I mean, if you’re planning to approach her at all, there must be something attractive about her…unless you’re just going by her cup size and she could be wearing a bag over her head for all you notice…and deciding who you’re going to approach in that manner will earn you an front-seat ticket to your own night alone, masturbating in your room…again.

Another part of this assessment is taking note of any little imperfections that you don’t particularly care for, and coming to terms with them, also much like your own self-evaluations.  Most girls aren’t perfect, and chances are that your first attempts at approaching women won’t be the knockout babes of your dreams…one needs a bit of experience before he attempts to hook any FFFs.

The point is to recognize things that could inhibit your interest, and realize that they’re not that big a deal.  This is what I mean by “come to terms with.”  Identify, accept, and put aside.  A girl is a complete package.  If you’re going to approach the girl, you have to like her for all she is.  I’m not saying be GLAD she’s one dress size over your preference, just accept how that’s a part of her, and how it means little to nothing in the grand scheme of things…

The challenge is this: you don’t have time to sit and stare at her like you do with a mirror at home…this assessment has to be done fairly quickly, or she’ll wonder why that creepy loser in the corner keeps watching her.  You should get to where a simple up-down can give you the basic info you need to reach your conclusionary decision of whether or not to approach.  This will take practice.  Don’t expect to go “instant-assessement” your first time you try this.  It’ll take a few times to train yourself to notice things at a glance.  Generally the first things you see aren’t the ones you want to bring up in a conversation, simply owing to male nature that the first things you see usually have nipples.

So yeah, step two is to become comfortable with the girl in question.  Once you’ve accepted the basic things that make her who and what she is, you’ll have less chance of stumbling, and the positive little things you noticed will make good compliments to work into conversation.

Here’s a bit of advice I’d be willing to bet you’ll quickly agree with: you’re going to perform your “game” significantly better if you’re comfortable: comfortable with yourself, comfortable with her, and comfortable with your surroundings.

The next few posts will detail a couple things you can do to get a little more comfortable with each of the above things.

1) Comfortable with yourself: this may seem silly, but look in the mirror once in a while.  Just look at yourself.  If you can manage to do it without feeling too awkward, be naked while you’re doing it, like in front of the full-length bathroom mirror.  Now, it doesn’t matter if you’re ugly, balding, overweight, or any physical problem…find something to compliment yourself on.  It can be your smile, your eyes, a bit of good muscle tone on your forearms…whatever you can see about yourself that appeals to you, something positive.  Every time you do this, find something new to be pleased about.  I advise doing this once every two or three days.

Also, after you find something good about yourself, find something not so good, and make a plan on how to deal with it.  If you’ve got a bit of extra weight around your stomach, figure out a plan to lose some of that weight, or at least come to terms with it.  It’s all about your self-image.  If you’re happy with yourself, then it’ll show and come off as an air of confidence, which is definitely attractive to women, even if you yourself may not be a Brad Pitt.  Attitude creates excellence, my friend, and a positive attitude about yourself can create excellent attraction between you and a woman.

 Just be sure you don’t overdo it…there’s a very solid and defined line between cocky, egotistical asshole guy and self-confident, happy-with-himself guy.  You don’t want to come off as narcissistic and conceited.  That WILL turn a woman off to you.

 So yeah, step one is to become comfortable with yourself.  Once you’ve made yourself aware of your good points, worked on or come to terms with your lesser points, and formed a positive self-image, you’ll display a confidence that will make you much more appealing to just about anyone, and in particular the ladies.